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“So they are no longer two but on flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” - Matthew 19:6

A Married Man

This is my first blog post as a married man; and man does it feel like a whole new ball game! My first marriage was not built on a relationship with God; and because of that, there was no foundation and the bottom fell out eventually.


Looking back, I see what a huge difference there is between me choosing, and when God has “joined together” two people.


Marriage: The Instrument of God


This moment in Matthew 19:1-10 is reminiscent of many stories throughout the Gospel. The Pharisees are trying to catch Jesus in a contradiction so they can accuse him of misrepresenting the law. Jesus doesn’t take the bait of course.

Their question was, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?”. Jesus responds quoting Genesis 2:24: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh”.

Up to this point in history, those words in Genesis had not been attributed to any speaker. That is until Matthew 19:6 where Jesus attributes them to God. I wish I could have seen the look on their faces.

Beyond a Ring and Paper


In one simple answer Jesus tells the Pharisees:


  1. God created marriage.

  2. Marriage is more than just a human agreement.

  3. Jesus was there when God created it.


When Becky and I started dating, we made a commitment to wait on intimacy until we were married.


We didn’t do it to challenge ourselves, or for bragging rights, we did it because we wanted to be obedient to God. What’s the significance of “man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife”? It signifies the establishment of a new family.


Becky and I had not lived with our parents in decades, but we wanted our “new family” to be “joined together” by God. It was also a very good lesson in how to “wait patiently for the Lord”.


Obedience to Love


My primary human loyalty is now Becky, before anyone else. When two become one flesh, they become obedient to each other, whether they like it or not.


In John 15:10 Jesus says, “If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love.”

The way I abide in my wife’s love, Christ’s love, and God’s love, is by keeping commandments. I know my wife’s commandments will be just as hard to keep as Jesus’s, but I’m committed to both because that’s what God has called me to by joining the two of us as one.


An Institution Under Attack


Those who know me well know that I’m not afraid to stand up for what I believe is right. I don’t give a spit about cancel culture and I’m not out to impress anybody but Jesus.


The attack on the institution of marriage, and child morality is serious.

They can pretend they aren’t coming after my kids all they want, but I’m not buying it. Teach your kids about having the kind of marriage God intended, because he has a very specific purpose for it.


The world is moving in a direction that treats marriage like some relic from the past, old fashioned, and out dated; which gives it the appearance of being optional. Christians are called to live in the guidance and power of the Spirit. Flesh and Spirit are “opposed to each other” (Gal. 5:17).


Flesh says “you can have whatever you want” or “you can be whatever you want”. Spirit says “be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God…” (Romans 12:2). It’s not old fashioned… it’s the will of God.

-Myke Mottie aka “The Beard”

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